The last two years have been a tirade of me wishing I had spent more time with the people that I’d claimed I held so dear to my heart. People that have had an impact on my life in profound ways.
Seasons change. Our living conditions and arrangements change. Time cuts rope that connects us and keeps us physically close. Phone calls and Text messages don’t have nearly as much an effect on the intimacy we share in the presence of each other. But somehow humans seem to have an innate ability to be ok with this. Human Nature is an interesting thing.
I should have come to see you when I told you I would. Having somewhat of an idea that the last time we saw each other would’ve been under different circumstances. I should have come to tell you how appreciative I am of everything you did to help me when I was, in retrospect at my lowest point. The camaraderie we shared. The words of encouragement you bestowed when Fortune seemed to have me bruised and bloodied-words when even at your weakest-you were still able to find to help a brother out.
I should have come to tell you how I took your words of advice and tread water to stay afloat. I stayed down until I came up.
I wish there were more I could do to help you when you needed it most. Not just take your word for it when you said you were ok.
Twenty-Five Hundred years ago, Seneca the Younger wrote in his timeless “Consolation to Helvia”:
“But the greatness of every grief that exceeds limits will inevitably snatch from one the power to choose one’s words, as not infrequently it stifles the voice itself.
Seneca: Consolation to Helvia
I’ve had a hard time finding the words to write down and even in prayer find it difficult to utter your name without a long pause before continuing to ask for the blessing of your soul. GOD kept you here long enough to touch the hearts of the people that needed it the most. I’ve watched you help people when you needed it more than they did, but as Seneca writes in the same timeless consolation;
“Let me assure you, GOD does not pamper a Good Man like a favorite. He puts him to the test, hardens him, and makes him ready for his service”.
Seneca: Consolation to Helvia
You’ve served diligently and performed your duties well, Jerry. We’ll all miss you. We’ll always Love you. Take your rest, my Dear brother.